ZATOICHI MEETS YOJIMBO
(1970). While this really doesn’t have anything to do with Kurosawa’s Yojimbo,
its none-the-less an outstanding entry in the hugely popular Zatoichi
series, as two great cinematic heroes meet. Shintaro Katsu, as Ichi wanders
into a town he had previously visited and finds it controlled by a dull-witted
gangster who employs a scruffy ex-samurai as a bodyguard. After some ins
and outs the two decide to team up, Ichi to rid the town of gangsters, and
the ex-samurai, Mifune of course, to find a stash of gold hidden by a silk
merchant. The plot thickens when a pistolero samurai/government agent shows
up. Mifune is called “yojimbo” (bodyguard) a lot, but his character’s name
is Sassu and he’s in love with a prostitute, and he’s a government spy,
so I’d think the Yojimbo title is just a convenient tag to draw in
the audience. No matter, the action is fast and furious, and the leads are
irresistible in their roles. The Ennio Morricone of Japan, Akira Ikufube,
supplies the score.
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| ZERO WOMAN (1995).
Everybody loves a nice slab of good old-fashioned Nihonsploitation, right?
This one is an enjoyably bad micro-budget SoV (and, unlike over here in
the US, the Japanese at least try not to make their SoV stuff look like
shit a la J.R. Brookwaiter or whatever the hell his name is) that features
the silicone supported Natsuko Ozawa as a government agent charged with
getting a stock-stuffed suitcase, but is thwarted by some punk rockers who
steal the case first, so she's given a partner, a corrupt cop. Our venerable
heroine is perpetually horny and topless, and manages to be raped and have
good old-fashioned sub-porno exploitation sex. Buttbuster offers an 'R'
rated version, which shouldn't be seen by anyone, since it cuts out the
sex. The cast also features Caine Kosugi, the son of B-movie ninja Sho Kosugi.
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ZOMBIE (1980). "We
are going to eat you!" the ads screamed, and when I saw a poster for this
as a kid, I desperately wanted to see it. When I finally did get around
to seeing it I wasn't disappointed, as Lucio Fulci delivers what can only
be called a masterpiece of the incoherent gore genre. Supposedly this was
advertised as a sequel to Dawn of the Dead, which was called Zombie
in Europe (this was called Zombi 2, originally) but it shares nothing
in common with George Romero's classic, instead it's an often amazing exploitation
film. It starts in New York harbor (as do most Italian made horror films
of the period) as an abandoned ship is found floating around the harbor.
When a couple of dumb harbor cops investigate, one has his throat torn out
like a zombie (which seems to begin Fulci's porno-like obsession is blood-spurting
come shots). Enter gallant reporter Ian McCulloch (who's enormous bald spot
is pretty shocking in and of itself) who meets up with the daughter of the
boat's owner (Tisa Farrow, I bet sis is proud) and together they travel
to an exotic tropical island presided over by Richard Johnson, a sweaty
doctor out of a bad imitation of a Graham Greene novel who's trying to stop
a zombie infestation. Along the way we meet swinging hipsters Al Cliver
(who's got a worn out looking push broom for a moustache) and Aurette Gay,
who's attacked by an underwater zombie, as well as the wife of our good
doctor, who gets her eye poked out by a shard of bamboo in a now classic
sequence that doesn't serve much narrative purpose, but then again, neither
does the underwater zombie. It all ends with an awkward attack by the zombies,
as our heroes are holed up in a church and Fabio Frizzi's cool disco music
plays unendingly. No plot or logic, but who needs such things? The gore
is the real star, and effects man Gianetto de Rossi provides it by the bucketful,
as people are eaten, de-eyed, etc.
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ZOMBIES' LAKE [Le Lac
des Mort Vivants] (1980). Some of Jean Rollin's films are watchable, but
he made plenty of hack shit on the level of Jess Franco, and this is by
far the worst. Not surprisingly Jess Franco was supposed to direct the film
but "disappeared" so Rollin was brought in but was unable to clear the air
of Franco's stink. The film deals with Nazis killed in a French town during
WWII. Their corpses are dumped in a lake which becomes haunted and years
later out come the Nazis for living dead revenge. At least the Italians
like to put lots of gore and boobs into their movies, but the French are
too good for that, at least at Eurocine, where the movies all look like
this, bloodless and mostly boobless. There's plenty of dreamy surrealism
and atmosphere, well would-be surrealism and atmosphere, which makes this
movie devoid of any and all entertainment value. The cameras were running
slow, making the film appear sped up, so Rollin had to direct the cast to
act in slow motion (which most of them were used to doing anyway). Only
Eurocine.
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