ASIAN TRASH CINEMA: THE BOOK, volumes 1 and 2. by Thomas Weisser. …and in conclusion Thanksgiving is a time of thanks and giving, like when the Indians and the Pilgrims had dinner together inorder to thank each other for giving the end. Oh, sorry, I was just writing a report for my college Old American Stuff Happening class. Today I shall review Asian Trash Cinema: The Book, which is different from Asian Trash Cinema: The Scent for Men or Asian Trash Cinema: The Raisin for those who Love Raisins. These, in short, are two of the many contributions our proud nation has made to world civilization in the wake of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. I quote our president: "Party the fuck on dude!!!" Right on! Huh? Oh, sorry. In short these two books are remarkable. Remarkable for being two of the most crudely written, most haphazardly published tomes to ever be sold mail-order in this country. The Turner Diaries is quite a bit slicker than this. Of course Mr. Turner, whoever he is, wouldn't like all this talkin' about 'dem 'der gooks an' 'dat 'der "cinerma" of 'ders. Huh? Oh, sorry. Let me quote a random review from BOOK 1. Spy Games, "An unsuccessful attempt at a screwball comedy, mixing romance, pop music, and espionage. A Japanese singer (Noriko Izumoto) believes her father has been kidnapped, so she goes to Hong Kong to find him. Quickly she finds herself emershed in the problems of an idiot news-reporter (Kenny Bee [Zhang Chen-Tau]), further complicated by a sexy policewoman (Joey Wang [Wong]) and a conflict with Russian spies." Wow! What a movie, but its "unsuccessful" in that case I won't see it! I don't know what "emershed" is, but I'll have none of it! I also wrote a review in this book, Tiny Chinese Men With Small Penis and Communism Shoot Many Gun and Run and Have Many Chinese Baby, "Starring Chow Yun-Fat and Leon Lai, wow, what a homoerotic team!" See, its easy to write reviews for movies, even Thomas Weisser can do it! You might be asking yourself, "myself, this review doesn't tell me if I should buy this book or not." To which I say, "you fuck up! you son-of-the-bitch!" I don't really say that because I can speak English, not the Chinese dialect, Smallpenisrich. Ha, ha, see, Asians have small penises! I can say that because this is the Internet thereby extra racist. Ha ha ha, come and get me you rice eating bastards!!